You can say what you like about Ant Jervis – and very few people do – but you just have to admit that when it comes to organising competitions, he absolutely blows your socks off. You can also say what you like about LMMGA, but when it comes to a healthy dose of verbal abuse, there is nowhere you will find more masochists who shuffle along each Sunday morning to have the p*** taken out of them. Why do I keep turning up????? Probably because i give as much as I get….or more if I can get away with it. So what has this got to do with telling you about our annual competition? Well nothing at all actually, just a healthy dose of writer’s garrulous verbage (another word to Google!)
Love or hate wireless connections, this is the third time I have written this article, the first two disappeared somewhere between the settee, the router, and the mast on top of the hill, don’t you just love technology. Where was I?…ah yes, the competition….
The wind was reasonably light and blowing South West, which means it is somewhere between the Mermaid and Edge Top. A large crowd of flyers had turned up at the Mermaid, some of whom did not want to enter the competition and stayed at the upper slope in delightful detachment. The A Team of 8 hardy souls (A for Ass**** not for supremacy), attended for the briefing, which in true Health and Safety traditions of LMMGA consisted of “8 rounds of fun me ducks, aw’ raate?”…I was none the wiser but smiled as though I understood.
Last year’s winner Tony was sharpening his nose ready for the fight. He had brought along the same winning model of the Dreamflight Ahi, and we were all suitably intimidated. We were also graced with the presence of Simon Cocker who suprised us all – more of this below. I do not have a fast light wind model that I am ready to trash on forced landings, so I chose my Easy Glider – with motor, which of course I never used – unlike others…. Whilst it floats, it flies like a pease pudding, so I wasn’t expecting Cups and Saucers to match, more the taking part, which is what counts……..said he with clenched teeth…
It is a week ago now since the comp, and at 61 I find it difficult to remember my own name, never mind all the rounds, but there was
- Landing on the spot, and the spot was a squirt of fresh cream. The winner had a punnet of strawberries on his nose (see what I did there?), but landed his model closest to the spot – I think Tony won it but not sure
- A flight, a roll, a loop and then a landing closest to 2 minutes whilst Ant was talking to you constantly, and everyone was trying to put you off. I won this round more by good luck than good management as I more or less lost count. I walked off gesticulating with one hand and flying with the other to get some peace.
- Pylon Race – most laps in 1.5 minutes – this is where Simon came into his own by using his motor round the down wind leg pylon. The wind was blowing slightly across the slope which made one traverse far easier than the others. I managed 7 laps and the winner 13 – Ian Webb won it with his 3 metre mouldie which went like a train. Simon…..disqualfied
- Most loops in 2 minutes was it – again won, I think, by Ian who managed, I think, 13. Here Simon came into his own by using his motor to power round the top of the loop – again, disqualfied. Strange…to be honest, I was joking with Simon beforehand saying that we would be alright because we had motors up front, never thinking he would use his. Simon said he was disappointed because we had a pact……
- A Fly off between Tony and Ian for the top prize of £10 which was won by Ian whose spot landing was closest.
Once again Ant produced cash for the winners of each round £5, and £10 for the overall winner. Pictures can be seen on our Gallery Page.
A great day once again, and well worth entering – what were those flyers doing on the same hill not entering? One has to respect the fact that some people do not like entering competitions. There were, however, some very good pilots amongst the conscientious objectors. Next year maybe…